The Reality of the Blunt Hodgepodge

You know what to do. 

1. What's your worst food memory?  How about one of your best?
Worst memory might be when someone took us to CiCi's pizza when the kids were little. We were on deputation, raising support for us to go to Uganda, so we hit the road shortly after dinner. When we stopped for the night at a motel, Stephanie climbed out of the van and proceeded to vomit all over the parking lot. Matt watched for a moment before joining her. We got them upstairs to the room, but there was little we could do about the parking lot. Or the fact that the kids had emptied their stomachs directly next to the driver's side door of a very expensive sports car.


2. Do you appreciate people telling it like it is, or would you rather a speaker temper his/her words and maybe beat around the bush a little?  How about when you're the one communicating...which type are you? 
Really don't appreciate people telling it like it is when I haven't asked them for their opinion.


3. What's your favorite place to hang out?
Someplace quiet. I haven't found that place yet.

4. When do you most feel like you're a slave to time?
Ummm ... all the time?


5. What was the last concert you attended?  Who'd you go with? Was it any good?
The whole family went to a Legacy Five (Southern Gospel) concert in January. Most. Fun. Ever.


6. Reality TV...harmful or harmless?  What's your guilty pleasure when it comes to reality TV?
I've been told on more than one occasion that our family would make a good reality show, but I tend to disagree. I don't think anyone wants to know us that well.


I don't want to know us that well.

7. What's something you think is overrated?
The ability to cook. 

8.  Insert your own random thought here.
Sometimes gray hair is caused by age, but most of the time it's caused by your kids.

The Simplified Hodgepodge

Read. Comment. Click. Repeat.  Couldn't get any simpler than that.

1. The first week of August is National Simplify Your Life Week...what's one thing you could do this week to qualify as a participant?
Get rid of my boys. It's not ethical, but it would certainly simplify my life.


2. It's also National Peach Month...peach pie, peach cobbler, or please pour me aBellini?  What's your peach pleasure?
Peach cobbler, and lots of it.


3. Eleanor Roosevelt once wrote, "Do one thing every day that scares you." Agree or disagree...explain.
I encounter something every day that scares me. It's called life.


4. What's your favorite household chore?  Yes-you have to name one.
Cleaning out my email folders.

What? She insisted I name one, and this certainly beats cleaning the bathroom!

5. Fodors recently listed (what they've dubbed) the ten most beautiful sunset spots in America. Click here to read more and see the pretty pictures, but this is their list:

Butterfly Beach in Santa Barbara CA, Mount Haleakala in Maui HI, Old Fort Marcy Park in Santa Fe NM, Laguna Beach CA, Hopi Point in Grand Canyon AZ, Four Seasons in Miami FL, Santa Monica Pier in Santa Monica CA, Gay Head in Martha's Vineyard MA, Ensign Peak in Salt Lake City UT, and Mallory Square in Key West Florida.

Have you seen the sun set from any of these spots?  If you could choose to watch the sun set this weekend from one spot on the Fodors List, which would you choose?  Where was the prettiest sunset you've ever seen?
I fail to see how their sunsets could be prettier than any other sunsets. After all, it is the same sun.


6. What's your favorite or most used app?  If you don't use apps how about your favorite or most visited website?
I have a lot of organizational apps. They're not used much, though. I think I need an app that organizes my apps.


7. We've recently passed the halfway mark for 2013...write a seven word sentence that sums up your year thus far.
This is too much homework for summertime.


8.  Insert your own random thought here.

Men are 6 times more likely to be struck by lightning than women are.
Just thought you ought to know!

An Inspiring Hodgepodge

I don't know about you, but I'm always inspired by the Hodgepodge. So come on and get motivated. Who knows, maybe the Hodgepodge will make you a star! After you leave a comment, go see Joyce and read everyone else's answers. And don't forget to add your own.

 

 

1. Share one way you think the world has changed for the better since you were a kid?
24 hour Walmart. How did I survive when they closed at ten?

 2. How 'bout one way it's changed for the worse?
Walmart in general. I always feel overdressed when I wear actual clothes instead of my pajamas.

3. Starlight, starfish, starling, Starbucks...your favorite 'star'?

George Clooney's always fun to look at.

4. Name a song that's overplayed, but you love it anyway.
My boys made up a song called, "I Am Not A Monkey, I Do Not Like Bananas". It's stupid and annoying, but they sing it in harmony and it makes me laugh every time, even while I'm telling them to knock it off.

By the way, that is the extent of the lyrics.

5. When did you last have home made ice cream? Your latest favorite flavor?
We used to make homemade ice cream when we lived in Uganda. We did it with powdered milk, and it tasted very weird. We haven't had homemade ice cream since. I guess you could say the experience left a bad taste in our mouths. HA!

6. What do you think is the best way to inspire or motivate people?
It beats the fire out of me. I spend a lot of my time trying to motivate the boys to do the dishes and get their laundry done.

7. When was the last time you were without power?
I'm never powerless unless I forget to take my Underdog Super Energy Pill.

8. Insert your own random thought here.I don't think people should post pictures of their feet on the internet. Unless, of course, it's pictures of a granddaughter's first pedicure.

 

That's absolutely okay to post!

 



A Royal Prince of a Hodgepodge

Time for our middle of the week break, so have a cup of tea and serve up a slice of hodgepodge. If this is your first solo flight, I doubt you'll get lost. Just leave a comment here, and then click on the big Hodgepodge button to see what everyone else has to say, and then link your own answers up. So easy, even a prince could do it.

1. July 24th is Amelia Earhart Day.  Earhart was the first female to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean.  What's something you've recently accomplished solo? 
I don't do solos. The best I can offer is a duet. I usually sing alto, and I play the piano at the same time because then, if I hit a wrong note people say, "well the poor girl was doing two things at once. Small wonder if she doesn't make a mistake!"

2.  What's one product you use that never ever fails?
Money. It spends every time.


3. Have you found your place in the world? Where is it?
At the moment it's sitting in my desk chair. Tomorrow I'm pretty sure my place will be at the grocery store.


4.  Worst movie you ever saw?
Anything with Jean-Claude van Damme or Chuck Norris. And trust me, with as many males as I have in my family, I've seen a lot of those movies. They are martial arts and special effects documentaries loosely hiding behind an incredibly weak plot line so thin that it's almost non-existent.


5. What's the last fun thing you did?
We just got back from visiting our daughter and her new husband. 

They look blissfully happy, don't they?

6. The month of July is named for Roman Emperor Julius Caesar...ever been to Rome? What's your favorite Italian dish?
Bradley Cooper. His mother is Italian and his father is Irish. And he is quite the dish.

Come on, you know you drooled.

7. What is one piece of advice you'd offer new mom Kate Middleton?
Get that silver spoon out of the kid's mouth before he chokes to death on it.


8.  Insert your own random thought here.
Why can I find Christmas wrapping paper in the closet in July, but I'll have no idea where it is come December?

The Hodgepodge

I know, I know. Boring title, right? I sat here for awhile thinking about the title, but I'm tired and I finally realized I could waste what brain power I had left coming up with a clever title, or I could spend it thinking up answers to these questions. I chose option 2. If you chose that as well, (and even if you don't), leave a comment after reading my answers, and then go prove that you can do better by clicking on the link and adding your own answers to Joyce's list.

1. Picture postcards were first printed back in the mid-1800's and deltiology is the official name for postcard collecting. When did you last send a postcard?  Receive one? Do you save postcards sent to you? Do you collect and/or send postcards when you travel?
I was a deltiologist when I was a child, although I was unaware of the term until now. And I probably wouldn't use the term now except on the blog because it sounds weird. Like a cousin to a proctologist or something.

At any rate, my grandmother decided that each of us needed to have a hobby, so she assigned one to us. I got postcards, which was okay, but I didn't think it was cool like my sisters' assigned hobbies. My oldest sister collected stamps, and my next oldest sister collected coins. Those seemed way cooler than my postcards. At any rate, at least I didn't have a lame collection like my brother's. Our grandmother assigned him to collect bottle caps.

2. What treat do you most like to indulge in while on vacation?
Relaxation. It's a luxury I can rarely afford.

3. Are you good at hiding your feelings?
I know it's probably hard for you to picture this, but I hide most of my feelings behind a subtle wall of sarcasm.

I'm sure that surprises you.

4. Does your town/city/county still deliver telephone books to your home? Do you check the yellow pages when searching for a local business number or has the internet replaced the phone book in your home?
Every company and his brother leaves telephone books at our house. I set them all aside in case I need them, which I never do, because I always look things up on the the internet.

The rest of my family never uses the telephone books because when they need a phone number, they just ask me.

5. Would you rather be first or last?
That would depend on what I'm lining up for, wouldn't it? 

6. July is National Park and Recreation Month (in America, but everyone can still play along)...where and when were you last in a park?  Did you participate in any recreational activities while you were there?
I was in a state park today. I rode my bike over the Kentucky Dam which is in the Kentucky Dam Village State Park.

Hmmm. That's not a national park. Does it still count?

7.  What was one of your worst ideas?
When I was seven or eight, I wanted to create some kind of a culinary delight. Since I am was limited both in talent and ingredients, I smashed pieces of white bread into a tight little ball and soaked them in pickle juice. I'm all about presentation, so I served each "pickle ball" on a piece of lettuce.

Small wonder most people just want me to bring the ice.

8.  Insert your own random thought here.
I like cake, but it has to be chocolate. And I'd appreciate it more if it had a scoop of ice cream on the side.

Just thought I should mention it.

The Helpful Hodgepodge

So since it's such a helpful hodgepodge, ya'll need to help by, first of all, leaving a comment here, and then by clicking on this link in order to join in with your answers and read everyone else's.

 

 

1. What's something people might ask you for help with?
I have occasionally had people ask me for help in coming up with a sarcastic quip or comeback. Seems I have a gift in that area.

 2. What's something you might ask someone else for help with?
How to control my gift for sarcasm. Apparently it's not appreciated by everyone.

 3.  Did your family take summer vacations when you were a child? If so, where did you go? If you're a parent, did/do you plan summer vacations with your own family? Did/do they resemble those you took as a child?
We took great vacations while I was a child, although the family didn't decide to go to Mount Rushmore until I was already married and had a family of my own. I've still not been to Mount Rushmore.

Not that I'm bitter.

 4.   Pool-lake-ocean...which one is most appealing to you on a hot summer day?
Whichever one's the closest!

 5.  Have you ever justified using the expression, 'you gotta be cruel to be kind'?  Was it really necessary or were you rationalizing?
Having never heard that specific expression, I never had to justify using it. I have been known to use this expression, though:  "Life's hard and then you die, now eat your breakfast." Not that I was trying to be cruel, but occasionally my children have needed a dose of reality.

They've threatened to put that phrase on my tombstone. Now that's cruel!

 6.  The Journal of Psychology recently mentioned the results of a survey identifying the ten most hated foods as-liver, lima beans, mayonnaise, mushrooms, eggs, okra, beets, brussel sprouts, tuna, and gelatin.  Of those foods, how many do you actually hate? Anything you'd add to the list?
What was their criteria and who did they survey? And are these foods most hated in the entire world or just in the United States?

And since this was a psychology study, what does it mean if we don't hate those foods? Are we more apt to become an ax murderer? Or a librarian?

I think I'd like to know the answers to these questions before I agree or disagree with any of the above survey results.

7. What's your favorite book or movie set in a beach or lake town?
I don't know, but I would like to write a book while in a beach or lake town. Shoot, I'd be happy just to read a book while sitting at the beach. ('Cause if you're in the town, you might as well be at the lake or beach. Otherwise, what's the point?)

 8. Insert your own random thought here.
 I mentioned recently that we are soon going to be downsizing our home. This week I had the boys going through their things to toss what they didn't need and pack up anything that wasn't essential. When I got home from work, I found that they had emptied boxes I had already labeled and partially filled so that they had boxes for their stuff. I made them unpack their stuff and repack mine, and then I sent them looking for more boxes to repack their stuff.

At this rate of triple packing, we should have everything ready to go by, say, ... 2015?

A Hodgepodge of Red, White and Blue

Get all patriotic and wave that Hodgepodge flag, people! You know you want to! Seven simple questions and a random thought. Watch out for fireworks!

1. What's one simple small pleasure on your summer 'to-do' list? 
I'd like to laze around on the back porch, sprawled in a hammock and enjoying a great book. Standing in my way is the fact that I don't have a hammock ... or a back porch.


2. Do you have strong feelings or opinions regarding the immigration debate in your home country? Feel free to share your thoughts, but please play nice.
Stated simply, follow the rules. And don't change the rules just so your political party is favored in the elections.

I realize there's a whole lot more involved in that. But this is a blog and if I really get going, you'd probably quit reading by the tenth or eleventh page.

3.  What's something in your home or wardrobe that could be described as 'star spangled'?
Considering the wear and tear my boys put on things, I think our home could easily resemble Fort McHenry ... after the battle.

4.  Is your house set up for a party?
A party for guys that want to play video games, wrestle and scratch and sniff with abandon? Absolutely. A party for civilized people? Not so much.


5. What one never-before-visited city in America, would you most like to see?
I recently found out that there's a town in Kentucky called Monkey's Eyebrow. Not sure I'd want to visit there, but then again, I think it would be better to go there than to go to Buttzville, New Jersey.


6. Your favorite red food? White food? Blue food?
Red food: M&M's; White food: ice cream; Blue food: M&M's. Hey, don't judge! That's as American as apple pie!


7. What freedom do you value the most, and why?
I value the freedom to raise my children the way they should be raised. And believe me, I exercise that freedom every moment of every day.

8.  Insert your own random thought here.
Some observations from a recent trip to Walmart:

Calling sleepwear "casual clothing" does not change the fact that you actually went to the store in your pajamas.

If you have dimples in your knees, you should probably skip the short skirts, even if they are selling them in the plus-sized section.

I don't care to see your underwear, and you look ridiculous clutching your crotch to keep your pants from falling down.

Just things I wanted to get off my chest. I feel better now.

The Hodgepodge Reunion

Is it a reunion if we were only gone for one week? I say so! We missed the Hodgepodge last week, so let's all make up for it by grabbing some sweet tea and a toothbrush and reconnecting again while everyone's favorite summer music plays in the background.

 

 

1. Summertime is a season of reunions, weddings, and other family celebrations and gatherings...are any of the above on your calendar in the next two months?

We just did a wedding last month.

 

And a very good time was had by all--especially the bride and groom!

 

2. June is National Iced Tea Month...are you an iced tea drinker? If so, how do you like yours (sweet, flavored, etc)? 

Why is there not a National Milkshake Month? That seems really unfair!
 

3. When were you last nervous?  Looking back, was the 'event' actually nerve-worthy?

I would like to know what the criteria is for "nerve-worthy". I like that term, but I want to make sure I'm using it correctly.
 

4. The bristle toothbrush was invented in China on June 26, 1498...not sure how that date was pinned down so precisely but, on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being sick to your stomach and 1 being not at all, how nervous do you feel when you're headed to the dentist?  Do you see your dentist twice a year?

You specify the bristle toothbrush. Was there another kind before then? The sponge toothbrush? The brillo pad toothbrush?
 

5. What's making news in your town this week?

The George Zimmerman Trial. Yep, right in my own hometown. And that's all I'm gonna say about that.

Okay, well I have one other thing to say. Don't believe everything you hear in the media.

Actually, I could say a lot more, but I think I'll stick with that. It's the most important.

6. Curtains, drapes, blinds...your window treatment of choice? Are there any bare windows in your house? Is that by choice or because you haven't gotten around to covering them? 

There's not much on the windows right now. We're in the processing of trying to downsize to a smaller house--not sure just what or where yet, but we're in the process all the same.

I'm not gonna lie to you--there wasn't a lot on the windows before we decided to downsize. We had nice looking blinds, and while I had plenty of ideas, I didn't have much in the way of extra money. Since our privacy was cared for, looking pretty on the windows took a lower rank in priority.

7. Summertime is officially here (in the Northern hemisphere anyway)...what one song is a must-have on your summer playlist?

I don't have a summer playlist. Or any playlist for that matter. I play whatever songs strike me whenever they strike me. And if that means I'm listening to Christmas music in July, then so be it.

 

Just for the record, I'm not listening to Christmas music right now. I simply reserve my right to do so if I choose.

8.  Insert your own random thought here.  

So the washing machine quit working about a week ago--a catastrophe at our house. Eight days, and seventy dollars spent at the Laundromat later, Indiana found the reason for the clog.

It was a penny. A penny cost us a week of stress and $70.

Talk about inflation!

 

The Truth of the Matter

I was shocked recently to come across some information that changes the way I view all of my growing up years.

 





A Dad's Hodgepodge Perspective

Dad's and cake. Couldn't get any better than this! Come on and join in!

1. What do you think makes a good dad?
This guy makes a fantastic dad. He's not too bad as a husband either. : )

2.  What's something you learned from your own father?
My boys have learned a lot from their father. Things like finding absolutely any reason to climb out on the roof, and the best way to throw toy soldiers with parachutes over the stair railing. 

I guess I ought to be grateful he hasn't combined those two, or I'd have boys parachuting off the roof.

3. It's your birthday-what kind of cake will we be having?
I love birthdays where I don't have to turn a year older yet! I will have some kind of chocolate cake with an extremely rich, creamy frosting. I'll also have some Cheesecake Factory cheesecake, and probably some cupcakes with sprinkles.
Sound like too much? Well, if it's not really my birthday, then the non-birthday birthday cakes won't have any calories, will they?
 
4. When you're faced with a big decision are you more of a go with your gut type of person, or are you someone who reasons it all out, weighing the pros and cons?
When my gut calls the shots, I tend to put on weight.

 5. June is National Dairy Month. What's your favorite dairy item? Most often purchased dairy item?
Ice cream. Or, ice cream cake. Oh! That's another answer for the non-birthday birthday question! : )

 6. Explorer Jacques Cousteau was born on June 11, 1910....what's something you've recently discovered or something you'd like to explore?
I'd like to explore the life of a lady of leisure. First hand, of course.
 7. Are you typical of your generation?
Yes ... if typical means that all women my age brainstorm about the best way to blow up a car or hide a body. I mean in the interest of writing fiction, people! You're so suspicious!

8.  Insert your own random thought here.
It's 90 plus degrees this week. The air conditioning in my van doesn't work. Everywhere I go I look like wilted lettuce.

It's not a good look for me.

A Successfully Completed Hodgepodge

Oh come on! You've wanted to do the Hodgepodge for a long time. What else have you got to keep you busy in the middle of a summer week? Read my answers and leave a comment. Then copy the link and answer the questions on your own blog. 

You know you want to.

1. Have you learned more from success or failure? Explain.
I'm very successful at failure. That probably also means I'm a failure at success, but I like to think positively.

2.  What did you call your grandparents when you were growing up? If you have children, what do they call your parents? If you have grandchildren, what do they call you?
Okay, so I called my favorite grandmother "Grammy" when I was growing up. I thought that was a pretty cool name, and one I'd be glad to let my grandkids use on me--once I got used to the "g" status, that is. But when we tried it with Stella, everyone kept referring to me as "Granny" instead of "Grammy". I am not about to load up a truck and move to Beverly, so I had to change it to "Nana". Now everyone calls me "Grandma", but that's her other Grandma's name.

I really don't think getting another generation older should be this complicated.

3.  You're invited to a luau.  In keeping with that theme, what dish will you bring to share?
No matter what the occasion is, my specialty always fits in. I would bring the ice.

4. Besides Jesus, what one person's life story do you think everyone should know about?
Ivar "Pop" Coulson, a Walgreens employee in Chicago who invented the malted milkshake in 1922.

5. "Don't sweat the small stuff." Agree or Disagree? Why?
Sweat is unpleasant whether it's in small amounts or huge rings under the arms. And amazingly enough, it's the small stuff that can make you sweat the biggest rings. Go figure.

6.  June is National Rivers Month. When were you last on a river? What's the prettiest river you've ever seen? What's a river you'd like to see?
I'm floating down the river of life. It's got some beautiful views, some ugly dead spots and a few rapids and whirlpools, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

7.  Speaking of rivers-paddling, fishing, swimming, or bird watching safely from the shore? Which activity would you choose? Yes-you have to choose.
Paddling sounds like too much work for a lazy summer afternoon. I hate fishing, and if you can fish in it, I don't want to swim in it. If I choose to watch from shore, do I have to watch birds?

I'm being a little disagreeable for such a simple question, aren't I?

8.  Insert your own random thought here.
I'm in full on summer mode. I want to eat watermelon and grill out. I want to have an ice cream cone and drink fresh-squeezed lemonade on the back porch. I want to go bike riding and have picnics and play catch in the yard. But the thing I want most for summer?

I WANT TO BE DONE WITH THIS YEAR'S HOMESCHOOLING BEFORE FALL!

The Most Important Parts

So in describing all the events leading up to Stephanie's (and Zack's) wedding, I thought I'd start with the most important stuff, which is anything that has to do with me.

Well as far as this blog is concerned, I'm the most important! Hello! Have you read the blog title? Whose place is it, after all!

At any rate, in spite of my inflated sense of my own importance, I wanted to be a help to my daughter in whatever way possible. Of course, many details associated with a wedding are outside my area of expertise. I was relieved to know I wasn't needed for flower arranging or hair styling or items of that nature. I was pretty sure I could help with decorating if all I was required to do was "hold this" and "hand me that", but it turned out I wasn't even needed in that area. So where did Stephanie need my help?

In the kitchen.

And, no, she didn't need me to make the ice.

What Stephanie wanted was help with the groom's cake. Except it wasn't a cake. And except I didn't just help. I was in charge of the whole thing. And it was a surprise for the groom. And I wasn't feeling pressure at all.

Stephanie wanted to do cupcakes instead of a groom's cake, and since Zack is a hunting enthusiast (did she pick a man like her daddy, or what?!), she wanted the cupcakes to be camouflage.

Yeah, that was my reaction too.

But being the dutiful mother of the bride, I didn't want to let my daughter down, so I scoured the internet for ideas. This link was a big help to me because it seemed fairly easy. And it had pictures. I studied this post for weeks, calculating my ingredients and visualizing my efforts. I collected the cake mixes and frostings needed, and made a list of the items I would need to bring with me to help make this masterpiece.

After studying as though for the test of my life, I was really confident that this would be a piece of cake. (Pun intended.)

Two days before the wedding I set up in the church kitchen, and, with Kylee's help, we made the cupcakes. We had a system. We had a flow. We had too much batter. We were supposed to make 100 cupcakes, but the batter made 150. No problem. We were expecting 300 or more guests for the wedding, so the more the better, right? Things progressed so easily that I was truly deceived into thinking I might be the next Rachel Ray. (I couldn't be Martha Stewart. After all, the cupcakes came from cake mixes and the frostings were canned. And I couldn't be Paula Deene. No butter.)

I moved along at top speed right up until it came time to frost them. I had no problem following the directions to mix the colors, but getting the frosting into disposable Ziploc bags and then getting those bags into a pastry bag and attaching the tip and ... well, that all requires coordination.

I don't have coordination.

I got more frosting on the outside of the ziplocs and on the outside of the pastry bag than I did on the cupcakes. Plus, I got frosting all over me. Instead of the three frostings coming out in a swirl, I could only get one out at a time. At one point I had frosting shooting out of both ends of the bag, narrowly missing the carefully carved fruit that was going to be served at the reception. I sent Matt and Kylee to the store to buy more frosting because clearly I hadn't considered the amount I would scatter all over the surface of the kitchen when I calculated how much I needed.

I continued to struggle, and could foresee being finished sometime in July. Perhaps we could serve them at an Independence Day celebration? Finally, someone came to my rescue. Someone who clearly knew what they were doing. Someone who had a vested interest in making sure these groom's cupcakes turned out spectacularly.

(Cue the Indiana Jones theme song.)

 

Yeah, I couldn't believe it either. The only thing I could figure was that working with camouflage came naturally to him.

 

Indiana perfectly frosted all 150 of those cupcakes.

 

 

I swear I could hear his theme music playing the whole time. And he did such a good job, I was only slightly embarrassed that my latest kitchen attempt had to be rescued by my husband.

 

I have promised myself that from now on when I'm on Pinterest, I will only pin sarcastic sayings. When I start pinning recipes and ideas, I fool myself into thinking I've got actual ability.

 

As for Indiana, he was proud of his accomplishment, but less than pleased when someone took his picture and put it on facebook with the caption, "Pastry Pastor".

 

That was as tasty as the cupcakes were!