Monday, July 13, 2009

Forest-Blocking Trees Part 2

So here is part two of Terry's and my odyssey toward marriage. If you would like to start at part one, click here.

My first week at college I met Mark. Cute, blonde and 6'8". He fit all my pre-requisites, especially the height part. We ended up in the same carpool going to the same church. We both worked in Awana. His sister was my roommate. It was clearly meant to be. But there were a couple of problems. The first was, he had a girlfriend. Well, sorta. He had a serious girlfriend in high school, but she was a year behind him. They had kinda agreed to date other people when he went off to college while she was finishing her senior year of high school. But there was still a strong tie between them.

The other problem was a little more serious. I didn't know how to date. I didn't know how to attract a guy. And I sure didn't know how to flirt. I was from a very small private high school. There were two of us (both girls) in my graduating class. The oldest guy in school was my brother, and he was a sophomore. Since I didn't know any of the conventional ways to get a guy's attention, I fell back on the one talent I did have--sarcasm. (FYI it doesn't work as well as flirting.) Mark and I spent all our time zinging each other. In fact, we entertained our entire church carpool with our witty insults. We developed a relationship, but it wasn't quite the one I had envisioned.

I put forth an effort. Mark's sister usually sat with him at different events. Since she was my roommate, I usually sat with her. I found out later that quite a few people thought Mark and I were dating because we sat together so often. I think Mark just liked having a girl's attention without having to put forth any effort for anything. As we insulted each other, I did occasionally wonder how things might change if we did start dating. I would hope we would stop the insults. But if we did, what would we have left?

Second semester I decided to make some changes. I still kept up the insult battles with Mark. After all, negative attention was better than no attention, wasn't it? But I also decided I wasn't going to limit myself should anyone else ask me out. I had a few dates, but they were not necessarily guys who matched my criteria. I turned one guy down only to find out he got kicked out of school the following week for getting another girl pregnant. I was also asked out by Barry "the Fairy" and a beige sort of guy named Hunter. At this rate I'd be a sophomore before I even had a steady boyfriend. I was pretty discouraged, but then I started hearing about a new guy on campus. A guy who was asking questions about me.

Unable to See the Forest for the Trees is the continuing story of how Terry and I met, and it runs on the blog each Monday. To read part 3, click here. This post is part of a Meetings, Marriages, and Memories carnival at Musings of a Future Pastor’s Wife. For more stories of romance or to tell your own, go visit!


  1. i had a mark in my life too - although he and i both seemed to take the other's insults as compliments. :P

  2. Oh wow, I can't wait for the next installment!

    I'm cracking up at your descriptions of the other dates! :)

  3. Oh, I'm so-o-o enjoying your story, Jill!! You're doing such a great job holding us in suspense! I'll look forward to the next edition! Thanks for sharing it!

  4. I can't wait for next week!!!

  5. Oooh, I can't wait to hear about the new guy & how he fits in to all of this!! & I love the "beige" description! That's awesome!


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