Tuesday, October 27, 2009

The Reason I'm Not An Icon

I've been thinking about icons lately. If you read this post you know that I will never be Martha Stewart. Or June Cleaver. I just don't have that iconic quality. Most of the time this doesn't bother me. In fact, it doesn't today. Much. At any rate, whether it bothers me or not, I got to thinking about being an icon. And I've come up with a list of ten reasons why I will never be one. In the interest of entertainment, I'm going to share them with you. And here they are.

1. I am not June Cleaver because I don't own an apron.

2. I'm not Martha Stewart because I don't own a multi-million dollar company. If I did, I have not doubt I would have more of a flair for decorating and baking.

3. I am not June Cleaver because, while I do own a strand of pearls, I don't wear them on a daily basis.

4. I am not Martha Stewart because I refuse to make lovely stocking stuffer holders for my pets' Christmas stockings.

5. I am not June Cleaver because, while wearing high heels, I have tripped up the choir steps, fallen off the platform and ended up in various other circus-style accidents. I would be dangerous wielding a vacuum cleaner in heels.

6. I am not Martha Stewart because I do not believe that my life would be better if I made wonderful little potpourri-filled sachets for my dresser drawers. I'm just happy if I can get my clothes folded before I shove them in there.

7. I'm not June Cleaver because my children are not Wally and the Beaver. (And quite frankly, I think I'm a better mother because I refrained from naming my children after rodents!)

8. I'm not Martha Stewart because I don't believe all recipes have to be completely from scratch in order to be good. And I don't always have to puree something before I serve it.

9. I'm not June Cleaver because I always thought her light bulb seemed a little dim. That raised-eyebrows-blank-stare-with-pursed-lips look can only get you so far.

10. I'm not Martha Stewart because I killed her off last week, remember?

The reason I'm thinking about this again this week is because I finally made banana bread this Sunday afternoon. I didn't really have time, but I couldn't bear to throw out a fourth batch of bananas. So I made two loaves. It took an hour and a half including baking time. That was several minutes more time than it should have taken. I know this because the bread was not quite as moist as it should have been.

Sunday evening someone at church gave me a homemade loaf of Amish Friendship Bread. It was absolutely delicious, and made my banana bread look worse than ever.

Today, less than twenty-four hours later, the Amish bread is completely gone. So are 1-1/2 loaves of banana bread. The boys didn't eat it because it was good. They ate it because it was there.

Moral of the story? Nothing I make has to be good. It just has to be available. Oh, and it always helps to know someone who is good at baking. : )


  1. Jill, I just had the best banana bread on Monday from a nice lady at work. She is Martha Stewart II! Everything she bakes is from scratch.

    I can safely say, that I will not ever be a replica of either icon. And I am fine with that. I wouldn't mind the strand of pearls though.

    Happy writing!

  2. Oh I just love this post! So much fun.

    It is nice to know that I am not the only "not martha stewart" around heren ;)

  3. Fun post today : ) That is one of the blessings of boys I think!

  4. You are hilarious! You're also my inspiration. Who needs Martha & June? :)


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