Don't Mess with the Best

Why would anyone want to mess with something as good as an M&M? I can understand that some people like plain and some people like peanut (I'm a peanut person myself). I even kind of like the way that they change colors according to the season. You've got all your pastels around Easter time; pink and red for Valentine's Day; red white and blue in July; and of course, the green and red at Christmas. I've even heard that you can go online and order a batch of whatever colors you want. I suppose that could match your wedding colors or holiday theme. Messing with colors is one thing, but when you start messing with the basic taste and goodness, you've gone beyond all bounds of decency. why would anyone want an almond flavor? And if you want peanut butter, buy a Reese's. Dark chocolate? Dove makes a nice one, (although I think you have to be a little twisted to prefer the bitter taste of dark chocolate anyway.) York peppermint patties give you mint and chocolate combinations.
As you can see from the candies I've mentioned, these taste sensations are already covered. There is no need to mess with the basic goodness of your standard M&M's. Still, for some reason people keep trying. I recently went to an anniversary reception where they had white M&M's at each table. I don't mind the all white, in keeping with the theme. What I did mind was the mint taste that came with them. When you look at an M&M, no matter what the color, you know what taste to expect. At lteast you used to. Now they have almond flavor, dark chocolate, and even peanut butter. Seriously, why?
The latest effort I've seen involves wild cherry M&M's. They can be described in one word: "What?" Of all the flavors to shock your system, this one has to be one of the worst. If you want red M&M's, order them online or save them up out of your weekly packets, but don't mess with the flavor. Some things were never meant to go together. Wild cherries and M&M's are just two of those things. They're deceptive as well. They look like regular red M&M's--a whole bag of them. But when you take a bite, you suddenly find yourself asking the age-old question, "How many licks does it take to get the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" If I want to contemplate that question, I'll eat a tootsie pop!
Come on, M&M guys! Plain and peanut covers all acceptable and decent options. Mess with the colors all you want--that's kind of fun. But don't mess with the flavor. When you've got perfection, you shouldn't try to improve on it.